Launching a business is hard, and that's the truth. I was down for a few days; things weren't lining up as planned. I had been feeling a little sorry for myself. Although logically, I knew I had a wonderful life. My emotions, on the other hand, weren't cooperating. I forgot for a minute to look for the blessings and that everything is happening for me!
I've never been afraid of tricky things or hard work. On the contrary, I tend to thrive on them. So why did I hit a slump, and more importantly, how did I crawl out? First, I tried the usual solutions: meditation, self-care, affirmations, music, and exercise. Then, when that didn't work, I went for chocolate, popcorn, and TV. Obviously, that didn't work.
Then I asked myself, "What advice would I give my son?" so I laced up my shoes, went for a walk in nature, and dug deeper into what was troubling me. That was the key! I needed to dig deeper. Something was holding me back, and I needed to face it. Being in nature generally helps open my heart. And once I hit the trail, the answer was clear; I felt alone and scared.
The truth is, I was expecting and wanting more encouragement from friends and family with my new business venture. In my head, it was a fore-drawn conclusion that as soon as my books launched, my people would rally the troops. I didn't ask for help—I ASS-U-med they would know what I needed. I didn't consider what was on their plate, either. I set expectations for everyone without clueing anyone in on what I now realized was my secret. I wanted help!
The problem is, asking for help feels uncomfortable to me. I'm afraid to make people feel awkward and intrude on their day. But, here's the thing: Asking for help is the kind thing to do for yourself and your loved ones. When we speak from our hearts and say what's on our mind, we give the person on the receiving end a chance to know us better and to hear what's in our head.
Finding a way to ask for help kindly and respectfully can do four things:
- First, it stops resentment in its tracks. If you're not getting what you need from someone and don't say anything, it can cause irritation. It's not fair to the other person. Who knows what they're thinking? And, until you talk to them, you don't, either. How are they supposed to know what you're thinking?
- It allows you to speak your truth, be vulnerable, and survive it.
- It's good practice; some conversations might not go as planned, but you'll still be breathing in the end. It builds muscles we need to thrive. When someone says, "I can't do that," you might feel rejected. But that is okay. You can ask why or why not to understand and move on with new information, which might help down the road when talking to the next person.
- An honest conversation can open the door for a more meaningful relationship. If you can open your heart and say what you need, the other person can, too. Maybe they need something more from you, or perhaps they want to set a boundary you weren't aware you were crossing.
If you're still nervous about asking for help, list all the reasons and possibilities why you're afraid, and then read through the list and see if you can identify the root cause. What's the common thread? Fear of failure, wanting validation, afraid of being vulnerable? That's the work for you at this moment, and it's coming up now because you're ready for the challenge. If you're afraid of failure, what's the worst-case scenario when speaking your truth? Maybe it's a friend telling you they can't help you because they don't believe in your work. You'll survive it, and it might help you thrive. What if you dared to dig deeper, take in the information, and use it for growth?
PRO TIP—Nothing ever happens that we aren't ready to handle! Everything happens FOR you, not to you!
Pray or meditate before you walk in the door or pick up the phone to have a difficult conversation. Ask your angels for guidance and pray the conversation leads to the greatest good for all involved. It's essential to start any discussion with an open heart and without attachment to the outcome. Then, when the conversation ends, see if you can be grateful regardless of the desired result. We can't see the whole picture, but our angels can.